CA3

Mr. Answer Person Responds to Email

Published in the Delaware County Daily Times on March 27, 2001.

The readers write:

Mr. Ominski:
You sniveling rat fascist. The proposed Bush tax cut will give more money back to the rich than it will to the poor. When will you Republicans realize that the poor need some breaks, too?
Delco Steve

Delco Steve:

If you wish to resort to name calling, let’s be accurate. I am a sniveling rat capitalist.

The proposed Bush tax cut will provide the most benefits to those that pay the most taxes. Think of it this way, if you want to go fishing, it might be a good idea to find a lake, stream or ocean, because that is where you will find the fish. In other words, you are not going to catch a lot of fish on the corner of MacDade Boulevard and Fairview Road. Therefore, people that don’t pay taxes won’t get any benefits from a tax cut, would they?

However, I do see your point that we need to do something to assist the poor. As we have seen from previous liberal Democratic tax initiatives, taxes can be used to change behavior, discourage certain actions and modify lifestyle decisions.

For instance, the luxury tax discouraged wealthy people from buying luxury cars and yachts. Forget that it destroyed the boat-building industry, it had the intended effect of stopping rich people from spending their money on luxury items.

Another example would be the "sin taxes" that discourage consumers from purchasing commodities that our government deems to be "unhealthy."

With these thoughts in mind, I propose the "poor tax." Here is how it works. We establish specific criteria to define what constitutes someone to be poor. Those that fall into that category would then be taxed about $1,000 a year. This tax will motivate poor people to become rich, and thereby, we will eliminate poverty.

John Ominski,
Mr. Economics Person

Johnny O:
Maybe you could consider writing about something other than politics. We now have an energy crisis, and California is experiencing regular blackouts. How about animal rights or the environment? Or are these subjects you know nothing about?
Mary J

Mary J:

With the exception of what makes women tick, I am an expert on every subject known to MANkind.

Let me begin with animal rights and the environment, as they go hand in hand. For example, the best environment for a cow would be upon a plate on my dinner table, medium well done. Yes, I belong to that other PETA group, People Eating Tasty Animals.

As for the energy crisis, I propose we bulldoze Alaska and start sucking all of the oil out of the ground. The moose, bears and Eskimos can all go live next door in Canada.

John Ominski,
Future Environment & Energy Czar

Mr. Ominski:
What is your position on school uniforms?
Ridley Teacher

Dear Ridley Teacher:

Since I am considering running for the Ridley School Board next election, I’m glad you asked. My platform will be the ‘Uniform Uniform.’

Every student, grades K through 12, will be required to wear a uniform. Further, none of this green, white and tan color scheme. The official uniform will be black and white stripes, with a unique number on the back to encourage individuality.

My other position will be to require teachers to work 12 months a year. Since there won’t be any students in the summer, imagine all of the new skills you will be able to obtain.

Also, we will provide you with uniforms. However, they won’t be black and white striped. They will be royal purple to reflect the dignity of your profession. Can I count on your support?

John Ominski,
Future Ridley School Board Member

John Ominski is a member of the Daily Times’ Advisory Board. He can be contacted via email at johneeo@rcn.com

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